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Student Independent News

NUI Galway Student Newspaper

Long distance relationships – A positive mindset

September 23, 2022 By Paris Ediagbonya

A lot of the time people go into long-distance relationships with anxiety or reluctance. The questions we

ask about them tend to focus on the possible losses we would have to face while spending time apart.

Are long-distance relationships difficult? Stressful? Worth it? These are all common apprehensions when

embarking on this kind of change. In my experience, these thoughts were often exacerbated by the

general negativity surrounding the sustainability of long-distance relationships.

Initial negative thoughts about beginning this new chapter started for me before I had even experienced

what it was like, which made it harder at first to accept this as a reality. Long-distance relationships can

begin for any number of reasons, from individuals pursuing education and employment prospects to

travelling abroad. Even if you are excited for these new opportunities, it can be difficult to be optimistic

about venturing into this new territory, which is often linked to omens of certain doom.

Of course, everyone’s experience will vary, but I found that starting out with an open mindset was key

to minimizing any worries during this transition. I believe healthy, fulfilling relationships can be

maintained with some time apart. Finding ways to spend time with each other during a long-distance

relationship helps with maintaining meaningful connections and a strong bond throughout.

Your virtual bonding needs or habits may vary from your partner’s, so take this time to explore different

ways of spending time with each other to discover what works. Some people find that calling and texting

are enough whereas others may also enjoy more interactive activities such as cooking, watching series

and films or having meals together.

It is possible that the interactions you find most meaningful may differ from your partners, in which case

alternating to accommodate each other’s preferences will ensure everyone’s happiness! If you’re

worried about keeping up the excitement, you can’t go wrong with switching things up sometimes.

Don’t be afraid of expanding your horizons and trying something new, you may find your favourite

bonding hobbies evolving with time too. Enjoying each other’s company is the main thing, so don’t feel

pressured to do anything elaborate if it isn’t meaningful to you.

It may not always be feasible, but when possible, try to arrange visits to look forward to. Having

something planned offers a milestone that breaks up the duration of your long-distance relationship. It

is normal to experience some distance blues, even if you’re taking care of your social and independent

needs. I find that having scheduled meetups often helps with overcoming these inevitable lows.

Your partner isn’t the only commitment in your life. Whether you’re working, studying or both, there are

other things which will occupy your time. Embrace this by continuing to do what is important to

you—meet up with friends, participate in societies and clubs, spend some quality time alone and read

that book you’ve been putting off. Taking this time to enjoy your independence will allow you to

appreciate this period of distance and make accepting this change, a positive experience.

Paris Ediagbonya
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